​i know

I know that if I cleaned my space or just hung out with my friends I’d feel better, but it doesn’t help.

It’s like there’s a ten ton boulder on my back pinning me to the ground, and I know if I just moved the boulder the pain would go away. But knowing that doesn’t make moving the boulder any easier.

Everyone always says “just start working out”, “just start taking care of yourself”, “just start going out more”, “you’ll feel better”. I know. But it doesn’t make doing those things any easier.

You’re just kneeling down to ask me if I’ve tried moving the boulder.