​My Hero’s Quest(s)

Pregnancy.

It could be about any number of things that have happened in my life: being a healthcare worker through a global pandemic, finding the courage to leave an abusive relationship, surviving SA in a society of rape culture, being a mom in general. Nothing and all these things could prepare me for the quest of pregnancy and birthing.

And yes, creating new life does qualify as a quest. Please do read on.

I started nice and comfortable in my own skin, for what felt like the first time in my life. I never pictured my life with kids, even with my husband at the time (see above for “leav[ing] an abusive relationship”). But the adventure of parenthood called to me; or maybe it was biology? Either way I got knocked up.

Don’t even get me started on the challenges which pop up during a pregnancy quest. If you or anyone you know or love has ever been pregnant, please make a list for yourself in your head. They [should/do] write medical textbooks about this stuff.

Being pregnant isn’t all bad though; for me it opened a whole new way to connect with my feminine energy and the energy of other mothers in my life. The wisdom of these mothers also helped to prepare me for the dangers of birth (my OB is included as she is also a mother).

By the time I arrived at the birth (for each of my kiddos) I thought I knew what to expect. Kid #1: I had prepared a birth plan and I was going to stick to it. Kid #2: I had already given birth once before. Silly me…

Now each pregnancy and birth is a different quest; each soul is prepared differently.

Kid #1: SURPRISE! He decided to arrive early; my water broke and I was having no contractions (not how labour typically begins). It’s cool I have a birth plan guys remember? And I was going full unmedicated. Well long story (nearly 36 sleepless hours from start to finish) short that didn’t happen. I ended up with epidural and Pitocin (Google it if you want) and some other stuff to get this kid out. It’s painful; I tear; baby’s blue; none of this was in my birth plan! But thanks to the wisdom of my [every birthing humans’] life experiences thus far (and my birth team), we both made it to the end of this birthing journey alive.

Kid #2: Wow do I want this baby outta me! I cannot go into labour soon enough. And remember, I’m an old pro now. {cue eye roll} I get the epidural right as I start to enter transition (IYKYK) and it’s the birth experience of my dreams. I push for maybe two minutes and he’s here! But oh no, now the placenta won’t come out, and now I’m hemorrhaging out, and I’m going under in emergency surgery (after being treated like a cow) [this is terror taking over now]. BUT….thanks to my life experiences thus far, (and the miracle of modern medicine) we both made it to the end of this birthing journey alive.

Quest = Journey + Gaining Experience + Danger + Applying Knowledge/Growth + Final Test

Thankfully I succeeded at both these quests, but not every hero returns victorious if they return at all. May we honor the hero’s journey in each other’s and in our own lives.

If you made it this far thanks for reading! This was self-reflection inspired by watching an episode of Bluey with my kids.