​cannot

I cannot wait to live alone. To walk through the doors of peace In a space entirely my own. Pick out my own soap, And live amongst quiet joy.

Yet it is easier to share a room with abuse than to live alone.

So find peace in my presence. Digest in my disposal, Agonise over wasted lines. Revel in my all consuming anguish To reunite with happiness.

And when I think of my future It is a blur I dream upon. Grieving the loss of the life I deserve But to leave behind the comfort of the fate I’m due, I’ll die.

I cannot live alone.