Every state should have its own “Chainsaw Massacre” movie
submitted by /u/flopsyplum [link] [comments]
Legalise suicide by maintaining that a person must add themselves to a suicidal list for 10 years, with access to mental health services free while on the list. If you commit suicide before the ten years, or before you even put yourself on the list, your assets go towards funding the programme
submitted by /u/Scumbag__ [link] [comments]
In baseball, rotate base-running directions: counterclockwise on odd days, clockwise on even days
Over the course of the season, this will even out any unfair advantages due solely to having more left- or right-handed players submitted by /u/Blinky_ [link] [comments]
Small shiny round electronic device with one button that beeps when pressed
Title describes the thing. Found on my couch. submitted by /u/RileyS707 [link] [comments]
Small off white cylindrical item with rounded button and AAA batteries.
Found in the back of new apartment closet last year when I moved in and I’ve just left it in a drawer for a year. the circular part in the middle is a button. Seems to be painted to match our walls. chapstick for scale submitted by /u/jarfieldbinks [link] [comments]
Feed hogs enormous amounts of coffee grounds in order to produce caffeinated breakfast meats.
“Don’t talk to me until I’ve had my bacon…” submitted by /u/I_might_be_weasel [link] [comments]
Timeshare Exit by Sales to Homeless People
Many people want to get out of their timeshares due to high maintenance fees. The Crazy Timeshare Exit Company transfers the deed to poor people, prison inmates, or the unhoused. All they need is an ID. Many of these are sold for $1 on eBay, so this should be easy. submitted by /u/Lockhimuptoday [link] [comments]
Dismantle Ticketmaster and sell concert tickets exclusively at record stores
submitted by /u/Lou_Dude929 [link] [comments]
Replace all the Flock cameras with guns and it just shoots you if you commit a crime.
Nothing to hide nothing to fear right?? submitted by /u/celebratorycremation [link] [comments]
They should have a “Reddit wasteland” where all removed and blocked posts are available to look at.
You can’t interact with them, the username is removed… submitted by /u/im_justkendra [link] [comments]
Instead of smart watch, have a silly watch that tells you silly things
submitted by /u/Lilpastadude [link] [comments]
Reboot the Twilight series but with Timothee Chalamet as Bella, Cate Blanchett as Edward and Taylor Lautner as Taylor Lautner
What a fantastic reboot right! Australian acting royalty, the boy sized eyelash and Taylor Lautner! Gotta reboot it before climate change means the end of snow in Forks. Nuff said. submitted by /u/nottitantium [link] [comments]
Suicide disposal service- set an appointment, and someone trained to see dead bodies comes and takes you to the morgue so your loved ones don’t find you
submitted by /u/Keep-Doing-Your-Best [link] [comments]
Start jerking off in front of flock cameras
The uglier the dude the better submitted by /u/septumchunks [link] [comments]
every year we send 100 golf players to die in the desert for the sins of humanity
submitted by /u/TheWaddlingweewee [link] [comments]
Pants pockets that connect so it doesn’t matter if you put your wallet in your right pocket, you can take it out of your left pocket.
But no, not just a long tube to connect the two. Some mini worm hole thing. Am sick of having the worng hand full so I gotta do this weird self-reach around to get my wallet or phone or keys of whatever from the other pocket. submitted by /u/nottitantium [link] [comments]
To fix plastic pollution, genetically engineer a fungus that eats plastic.
Also, engineer it to not eat the type of plastic used in medicine. submitted by /u/Financial-Event377 [link] [comments]
People from Birmingham, US should vernacularly call themselves “Alabrummies” in reference to how Birmingham, UK citizens call themselves “Brummies.”
I don’t know. If I live in the city named after the one in the United Kingdom, I should at least get some influence from them. submitted by /u/EricCartoonBox [link] [comments]
Disposable sponge in the restroom for blotting the penis.
At penis height, there is a compartment for a disposable sponge, with the sponges themselves located right next to it. You enter the stall, hold your penis with one hand while urinating, and use the other hand to insert a disposable sponge into the compartment. Once you have finished urinating, simply press your penis against…
For Halloween, a solid chocolate zombie with a skeleton on the inside made of either candy cane or malted milk.
submitted by /u/Top-Requirement-2102 [link] [comments]
Instead of the manosphere, drag queens should provide classes on teaching men how to be more confident
submitted by /u/orsodorato [link] [comments]
A fashion trend where the balls/scrotum get the same emphasis and cleavage as breasts in outfits
Imagine the equivalent of getting bra fitted for balls. Maybe less men would get on TRT as that shrivels up the boys submitted by /u/CoastieKid [link] [comments]
A bag of chips should come with a free Muppets finger puppet
the muppet finger puppet should be loose in the bag so it gets covered in chip dust and you have to lick them clean. people will accidentally eat them, but that’s a sacrifice we should be willing to make for the sake of this endeavor submitted by /u/CurlSagan [link] [comments]
Invent time travel, so you can go back to in time to teach yourself how to invent time travel, so that you don’t have to work it out yourself.
submitted by /u/afungalmirror [link] [comments]
6 hour days only working 3 days in a row would still average 33 hrs a week(alternating between 30 and 36).
Thought a ban on working 4 days in a row would make it easy to take care of our health and have more chances to catch up on sleep. Then I thought alright I could catch up on sleep, but I could still feel like crap getting up early after not having the best night’s…
Stop AI use on homework by abolishing homework
To my understanding, homework doesn’t benefit kids much anyway, especially at an early age. Maybe give them projects in high school and actually let them use it as a tool. And funk it, now that we’re practically thinking a thought and manifesting it before our eyes with AI, up the expectations. “You get an A…
A 50,000 item or more line at the grocery store for people who buy bulk rice.
submitted by /u/PM_Your_Wiener_Dog [link] [comments]
Reverse hospital
A reverse hospital where they pay you money to infect you with diseases and inflict bodily damage. Your payment is the equivalent of whatever it would cost to treat the same issue at a typical hospital. So people could go, receive an injection of sepsis, get paid, and then go to a hospital to use…
What is this white pipe thing for next to my hose/water pipe?
submitted by /u/toopoonoo [link] [comments]
Fridge sized electrical equipment found at the end of hiking trail,
I came across this cabinet of gear just below the end of a hiking trail, underneath a roughly 10m tall boulder. The top of the boulder was previously accessible but the access was removed. I had wondered if this was potentially pushed off the top and it looks burnt? Thanks in advance submitted by /u/yehoodles…
The equator should be a real line painted around the Earth
Hear me out, the equator should be physically marked wherever it crosses land. We spend our whole lives looking at it on maps, and being able to actually see where the northern and southern hemispheres meet would be genuinely useful for education and tourism. It seems weird that one of the most important geographical boundaries…
A TV that syncs with your AC to automatically adjust the volume when the AC turns on and off
submitted by /u/JayGold [link] [comments]
Anyone who crosses the threshold from Millionaire to Billionaire agrees to be hunted. Choosing to not donate what you make over $999,999,999 makes you fit for public consumption.
If you want THAT LEVEL of opulence, which comes at the expense of the impoverished, all millionaires understand the social contract that they must forever pay for private security and ward off attacks once choosing to hoard past that gate. By crossing into Billionare status, you sign up for your whereabouts to be tracked and…
Mandate that all new data centers be built at least 1 meter underground, have a closed loop cooling system, produce their own independent energy, and pay a dividend to members of the community in which it exists.
Putting them underground reduces cooling costs and keeps the land above available for green space. A closed loop system would force them to use the same water to cool the systems without chewing through the fresh water supply. They’d have to produce their own energy through renewable sources. Solar, wind, geothermal, I don’t care figure…
I’m sick of having to have a shower every morning. I want a robot to wash me while I sleep.
It’s freezing in the morning this time of year. It should dress me and brush my teeth too and carry me to the car. submitted by /u/Scrangdorber [link] [comments]
Pringles should lean into the DIY eclipse viewer angle around eclipse time, with the cans containing everything you need to watch the eclipse safety
submitted by /u/Scumbag__ [link] [comments]
A hotel with two-way mirrors only. The people on the mirror side pay 0.1x the normal rate, the people on the see-through side pay 100x the normal rate. The mirror side gets a cut of the see-through side’s rate.
If you stay in the mirrored side and no one wants to watch you, well at least you get a cheap room wherever you’re staying. If someone is willing to pay to watch you, you make good money and some voyeur gets their rocks off. Room allocation is random to avoid stalkers, except for maybe…
D.A.R.E. program but for teaching kids their rights.
submitted by /u/Keep-Doing-Your-Best [link] [comments]
Put an air conditioner between two adjacent rooms, turn it to max, and sell one room as a sauna and the other room as a cold plunge.
submitted by /u/TheGruenTransfer [link] [comments]
A card you hand someone to let them know you’ve lost interest in listening to them any further.
“This card is presented to the person I wish would become silent, so that the reception of this card may signal to the recipient a subtle suggestion to either speak less or speak elsewhere. You have lost conversational privilege with me, and I would like to continue to be in the same room with you,…
Billionwheres.com – a public schedule of billionaires whereabouts and schedules
submitted by /u/Keep-Doing-Your-Best [link] [comments]
Ground oats are “oatmeal”, so ground beef should be “beefmeal”
submitted by /u/flopsyplum [link] [comments]
Create new cities for yimbys
Ok here’s the idea (one of the *least* crazy ideas I’ve posted here, I think this one is pretty solid but I also appreciate the open-mindedness and good humour of this sub): Cities with existing neighborhoods come with an existing set of expectations for how existing residents will be consulted about new developments. It’s basically…
Nicotine should be put in toothpaste to help people brush their teeth more often
Many people forget to brush their teeth or just overall have a hard time doing it due to depression, ADHD, or other factors and I think a way that could help that is if toothpaste 1) comes in more flavors (for adults) besides just mint and the occasional wildcards such as cinnamon or anise. Flavors…
Thermostat that displays a photo of the last person that changed it
submitted by /u/Keep-Doing-Your-Best [link] [comments]
